Now is the time for healing; for ourselves, our land, and our families. It is a time to let go of our selfishness and pride, a time to let go of the past and rejoice in the present. There are many things in my life of which need healing. There are many wounds which I have obtained throughout my years on this earth. I would like to share with you my healing experiences as I go through them, that some with similar experiences may be able to heal along with me. Initially, I was a bit skeptical of sharing such things consisting of a personal nature within my life, but why keep things hidden from the world which must know they are not alone in their hurts. As much as some may need to read the words I write, it is as much as I need to write the words which will be read.
I will start out with my mother, for it was through the passage of my mother of which I entered this world (and also since it is approaching Mother’s Day). I was not one who was expected to be entering into this world seven years after my mother gave birth to my brother. All baby items had been cast out and given away by the time the notice of my surprise arrival was declared. Now they had to re-obtain all of the previous baby items all over again. God was watching over me from the very beginning of my life, He had a plan for me.
My mother was a non-educated woman. However, she was a hard worker and not afraid to serve others. She would do whatever labor she had to without complaint. She married a man 22 years her senior (my dad). Things were not exactly smooth going there either. My mother handled life in the best way which she knew how. She had a submissive/passive character to her. She did not have a lot of confidence in herself and high-esteem, therefore she endured things which otherwise she may not have if her voice was made known. The only things which my mother could give to me and my brother, were things which were already given to her in her lifetime….everything else was unknown and foreign to her. There were decisions I made for myself at a very young age, fears I held within, privacy was non-existent, a voice which was not heard, and various other accounts of which I will not go into.
I was no angel either. I disrespected and took advantage of my mother from the age of 13 and on. I disregarded all of her warnings and instructions. I thought I knew the better answers more than she did. (There was no innocence in my life, it was all taken away from me at an extremely early age.) It was like my life was polluted and from that pollution, instead of staying on the path to cleanse it from me, I chose to pollute it even more. My mother tried as she could to keep me on the right path in life. Unfortunately I did not step into my mother’s shoes until much later in life. God showed me so many things about my mother, which led to my heart pouring out for her. I am blessed with a mother that loves Jesus and puts Him first above all things. Regardless of what happened in my past and what I went through, involving my mother, I forgive her. I forgive you mom! I am blessed to have you as my mother and I am so sorry for the countless times which I have not showed you honor and respect. I apologize for the times which I have not shown you the love of Jesus. I am sorry that you had to wait all these years to feel my forgiveness.
It is not about what my mother did or did not do, it is about how I did not show her the due respect and honor which is instructed of children to give to their parents.
I ask that on this Mother’s Day everyone show the honor and respect that is due your mother regardless of the past…follow the instructions of God and honor your mother…God will take care of the rest…making it a new beginning and a more loving future. Show your mom Jesus today and everyday! I love you Mom!!!